Christy Holliday Douglas, from Galivants Ferry, South Carolina, vividly recalls one big family trip from her childhood: a 1960 journey to Disneyland when she was six. “It had just opened, and we were beyond excited,” she says. The family took a train from Florence, South Carolina, with stops in Michigan and Minnesota. “People were fascinated by our Southern accents,” she recalls.
That trip sparked her lifelong wanderlust, which she and her husband, David, passed down to their children and grandchildren. But, she admits, traveling with your kids is one thing; adding in their spouses and grandchildren turns it into an entirely different adventure. Yet for Douglas and three other Southern grandmothers, there’s nothing quite like it. Here’s how they make big family trips work.
- Christy Holliday Douglas is a grandmother from Galivants Ferry, South Carolina.
- Laurie Hardaway is a grandmother from Gloucester, Virginia.
- Debbie Curran os a grandmother from Richmond, Virginia.
- Jen “JJ” Booth McPhee is a grandmother from Fernandina Beach, Florida.
Keep Privacy in Mind
Privacy is critical with a big group, whether you’re renting a beach house like Laurie Hardaway, a grandmother from Gloucester, Virginia, has done for the past twenty years, or booking hotels abroad. For Debbie Curran, a retired educator from Richmond, Virginia, who is taking her four sons, their families, and children to Barcelona for her and her husband Keith’s fiftieth anniversary, time together—and apart—is essential. “Our Barcelona rental has six bedrooms, each with its own bathroom,” she says.
Jen “JJ” Booth McPhee, a Fernandina Beach, Florida grandmother, agrees. When her family visits her home for the holidays, she considers a hotel rather than a rental house. “I book hotel rooms for the parents the day after Christmas,” she says. “That way they get a break, and I get more one-on-one time with my grandkids.”
Don’t Overschedule
Balancing the needs of a large group, especially with young children, can be challenging. Hardaway, who has three grandkids under age four, stresses the importance of keeping things simple. “Don’t expect a week-long vacation with toddlers to be relaxing,” she advises, encouraging grandparents to embrace the chaos and support the parents. “Grandparents can give exhausted parents a much-needed break.”
Douglas, who recently took her family of 13 on a safari in Kenya, emphasizes not overscheduling. “Kids are usually just excited to be along for the ride,” she says. Flexible activities are key. Curran suggests planning one optional activity per day. Both Douglas and McPhee agree: when in doubt, opt outside. “You can always find something fun, whether it’s a nature walk, a motel pool, or stargazing in a new place,” Douglas notes.
Divvy Up Responsibilities and Consider Budget
McPhee’s family, for instance, divides up meal preparation. Each family is assigned a dinner to handle. “They have to do it all, cook, clean, and pay for it for everyone,” McPhee says.
While it’s generous for grandparents to treat their families to a vacation, it’s important to consider everyone’s budget and discuss costs openly. At the same time, McPhee encourages grandparents not to shy away from planning a big family trip due to expense. “It’s not the price tag people remember,” she says, noting affordable options like the Florida Parks System, which offers nice, budget-friendly cabins if booked in advance.
Curran shares a savings strategy she’s used since her boys were little. “We used to set aside $50 in an envelope for each day of the trip. If we didn’t spend it all, we rolled it over to treat the kids to something special, like mini golf, the next day,” she recalls. Now, she has a dedicated travel savings account, which has allowed their large family to take trips to places like St. Augustine, Florida; Cape Cod, Massachusetts; and Charleston, South Carolina.
Keep Calm and Vacation On
When things go awry, as they often do, it’s important to find humor in the situation. McPhee fondly recalls a time her granddaughter slipped through an inner tube while the entire family of 10 was tethered together, floating down Ginnie Springs in Florida. Fortunately, the tot’s water wings kept her afloat, and instead of pointing fingers, the whole family had a good laugh.
If everyone cannot make the trip, take it in stride, Curran says. There’s no point in making anyone feel guilty for schedule conflicts. And remember, travel agents still exist and can make the planning process smoother and your time more enjoyable without having to sweat the details. The most important thing isn’t the destination or even the itinerary—it’s the time spent together. As Hardaway wisely notes, “Being with the people you love most in the world is the best gift you can give yourself.”
