Snow in the South is a whole event. At the first hint of flurries, we’re stampeding “The Pig,” snatching up every loaf of bread and the last gallon of milk. Most of the time, snow predictions fizzle, leaving us to invent sandwiches for all our extra bread. In our defense, it’s not entirely irrational. Snow here is feast or famine—either nothing or a blizzard that shuts down life for a week. Every Southerner who remembers the “Winter Storm of ’93” shivers at the memory: snapped power lines, no heat, impassable roads, and days without TV. It’s no wonder we prepare for even a single flake.
Our children do not own sleds. We have no snow shovels. And so, our commentary during heavy snow differs from people accustomed to yearly snowfalls. Since snowstorms, or the change of snowfall, is an unlikely occurrence, we tend to repeat ourselves by saying the same things every year. These are the sayings you’ll hear only in the South when there’s snow in the forecast.
Sayings When There’s a Chance of Snow
- “We don’t have snowplows down here, y’all!”
- “Should we cover the plants?”
- “The whole town is already shutting down!”
- “Y’all, don’t forget to drip your faucets!”
- “The weatherman lied. This is going to be more than a cold snap.”
- “Get to the Piggly Wiggly before they run out of bread!”
- “Everybody else is buyin’ milk and bread; I’m buyin’ beer and charcoal.”
Sayings When it Actually Snows
- “It’s sticking, y’all!”
- “We’re not built for this!”
- “This is nothing like the Blizzard of ’93.”
- “You know this will all be gone by tomorrow.”
- “Time to make some snow cream!”
- “The dog won’t even go outside in this mess!”
- “Do we know anyone with a snow shovel?”
- “Can you clean a windshield with a spatula?”
- “What do we have that can get ice off a windshield?”
- “Can you wear Wellies in the snow?”
- “The power’s out! I just hope my casserole doesn’t turn.”
- “It looks like the neighbors have power. Do you think they’d let me plug in my Crock Pot?”
- “Before this happens again, I’m buying a generator.”
- “Did you call the power company?”
- “Have you heard from the power company?”
- “Hallelujah, there’s a power company truck outside.”
- “Let’s have a word of prayer for the guys from the power company.”
Sayings About Roads in the Snow
- “The roads are slick as butter.”
- “Y’all better not drive in this mess.”
- “The main roads might be fine, but the side streets are a mess.”
- “You’d think people would learn to slow down.”
- “They’re out there sliding around like it’s bumper cars.”
- “These roads were bad enough before the snow!”
